rsedmak

Fear of failure is a recurring theme in most people’s lives and careers.  Why? In general, fear of failure is a result of putting too much stock in what others think of you.  Most people put too much stock in what other’s think of them, because they lack a certain confidence in themselves – paradoxically, a confidence which many of them could attain by facing their fears.  The truth is, everyone fails, and some of the most iconic and successful people of all time have admitted that their success was directly tied to the number of times they attempted to succeed (the majority of their attempts were failures).  As Henry Ford said “Failure is but an opportunity to start again more intelligently.”

A mentor once told me, fear can be an indicator that something is dangerous, and you should be cautious or move away from it.  But, more often, he said, fear is a signal that you should move directly toward what you’re afraid of.  Think about it- what things in your personal life, career, or business are you most afraid of doing?  Most likely, what you are most afraid of are the same things that everyone else is most afraid of.  But if you can move beyond the fear and face them, you’ll be in the minority that do.

That’s why it’s lonely at the top- there are very few people who have the courage and discipline to consistently move toward their fears.

When I was sixteen and running my first business, I came to this realization.  I started as a kid with social anxiety disorder who was afraid to pick up the phone and talk with people – not the best situation for an aspiring entrepreneur to be in.  But then I resolved to break out of my comfort zone at least once a week.  I believe that this was probably the largest contributing factor to the success of that business.  But it wasn’t easy.  Slowly my confidence built and I realized that there were fewer things I needed to be afraid of, and more things that I could face head on.

After taking a six year hiatus from being disciplined about this practice, I reimplemented my once-a-week fear busting policy last year.  It’s been working wonderfully, and as of this writing, I’m now trying to push myself out of my comfort zone at least three times a week.  Really, there’s no downside, and an interesting benefit is that once you move beyond a fear, you leave that fear and fears of a similar magnitude behind you.  You end up with a dramatically improved perspective about what matters and what doesn’t.

More recently, I read the commencement speech that Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple, delivered to Stanford students several years ago:

“All external expectations, all pride, all fear of embarrassment or failure—these things just fall away in the face of death, leaving only what is truly important. Remembering that you are going to die is the best way I know to avoid the trap of thinking you have something to lose. You are already naked. There is no reason not to follow your heart.”

I challenge you to ask yourself weekly, “What is the one thing I should do, but am most afraid of doing?”  And do it.  One month from now you’ll feel amazing.

[Photo: Flickr/IronRodArt]